MP's kids held hostage by fossil fuel industry

Some unnamed fossil fuel industry evil-doers appear to be threatening to hurt Auspol politicians’ children if the politicians don’t do the fossil fuel industries' bidding. It looks as though this is also happening to politicians around the world. 

This claim is based on deduction in lieu of direct evidence: blackmail is the only logical explanation for why anyone with some power to avert the coming climate catastrophe, would hurl their own kids into the apocalyptic abyss in coming years, in order to save them from harm today.

There’s the slim possibility that some of the politicians remain wilfully ignorant of climate threats but this doesn’t cut it. Even if the politicians thought there was only a 10% chance of a plane crashing, there’s no way they would put their kids on that plane. And our current chance of a  ‘Global Climate Catastrophe’ is now way over 50%.

It’s worth considering that these politicians are all psychopaths; they don’t care what happens to their kids, or care more for money and power granted by the fossil fuel industry today. However, psychopaths reportedly care about their own fate and these politicians have signed up to a mutual suicide pact, perhaps it is the older ones who think the climate collapse will occur beyond their end of life. 

A climate campaigner asked Mark Butler, then ALP shadow Minister for Climate Change (he apparently knew too much so was replaced last year), ‘Don’t you love your children?’. Because why would anyone that knew so much about global warming and loved their children promote the suicidal target of Net zero by 2050 as safe? 

In response to the question, Mark Butler immediately lost his measured cool (by all accounts for the first time ever), demonstrating that he does in fact love his kids, but more immediate threats than a global catastrophe hang over him and his children .

So how should we save a chamber full of MPs suffering under the most vicious blackmail imaginable? Easy: we vote them out. Then the blackmailers have no hold on them.

Just as with any spy blackmailed into being a double agent, we need to replace these MPs immediately with those who have not yet fallen under the searing hand of the fossil fuel industry.